Holy balls. So, I know I need to write in here more. I always think about when I need to or what I have in mind!!
First thing is first. THE CHIVE MEETUP IN DALLAS THAT WE HAD ABOUT A MONTH AGO. yes. A month.... haha
It was EPIC. I got to get away for a couple days and enjoy my best friend. Pillows divided the bed and all. Yeahhh buddy. Apple Pie Moonshine... Thinking of Jake Owen the whole time I would get it, make it, or whatever. Met so many new people. Danced like a fool. Drank crazy amounts of alcohol. And last but not least, got to let loose. Now, I haven't got to "let loose" since I got pregnant in November 2010. I never go out, if I do, it is to a movie. or to a bonfire and back home in like 2 hours. There were stuntman shots, the cops called a billion times to the hotel. People blaring music at 7am!! ON WEEKENDS AND VACATION. NO. GO BACK TO SLEEP. bahaha. If you don't CHIVE ON. or come to my OKC Meet. Which I have seriously been lacking on this past week. Sorry! I worked 48 hours last week. haha.
Gots me a boyfran.. oh, hai boy, hai. WTH? yeah. I'm running on two hours of sleep today! We knew each other in Hawaii, reconnected last year, and skyped while I was in Dallas, before then, connected, like hey you! yeah, your face. I like that shit. If you can talk in Star Wars quotes and imaginary scenarios. Then, you pretty much stole my heart. We pick on each other. and I absolutely am happier than I have been in a long time. This woman doesn't settle. She picks with love and care. :D
People getting married. EVERYWHERE!!! Congrats to you all!! If I ever remarry and get to that point. Divorce is NOT an option. You cheat you get the boot. I ain't dealing with that shit again, haha. Better grab some whiskey go sit down, think of why you two fell in love and work that shit out! Fight for one another. Couples give up too easily. I waited 5 months of knowing about all the cheating to confront him. Oh, hell. the proof along made him not happy. But, hakuna matata. My son and I deserve better. Couples fight all the time. Over petty shit! Like who the fuck says, You killed my fish, I'm leaving you! Bitch. It is a fish. A FUCKING FISH. haha. or You had a dream about Rhonda. You must be cheating! First off, sit down, and leave this woman. She is psycho.
GUYS!! HERE IS A LIST OF WHAT YOU NEED IN A WOMAN.
1. SHE CAN COOK! Good god, WE don't like twigs. Or woman that burn ramen noodles. Come on now.
2. She loves you unconditionally.
3. She trusts you! She puts all her heart and soul into you! Better keep that close to your head. Screw heart. Ya'll sometimes need to think deep.
4. She doesn't ask about weird things. Like, I went through your phone contacts. Who is Courtney? LEAVE THEN.
5. She has interests that you do!
6. She is down to earth. For Christ sake... We don't need drama and you getting grays in the first 6 months because of some broad.
7. She is chill with you going out, drinking, partying, hanging around girls.
8. She doesn't need a manual to understand her.
9. She tells you everything that is wrong! She communicates with you.
"Babe why are you mad?"
You said this, and it upset me a bit.
"Oh, I am sorry, won't happen again. love you."
I just solved all your problems. don't fight about it. MOVE THE FUCK ON.
10. She supports you, stands by you, if you are in long term, long distance ish, She will most likely tell you where she is at, what she is doing, where she is going, because she trusts you and wants you to trust her. She fucking likes you. you like her.
GIRLS.
1. He picks on you and return with some smart ass remark right back. And likes it... keep him.
2. Sends you flowers and shit just because he wants to. Don't ask questions. Like that man.
3. If you have KIDS. and He doesn't GIVE A CRAP that he is now a jungle gym. He's a blue ribbon winner.
4. Tells you the honest to god truth if some experimental food tastes like bigfoots dick. Don't get fucking butthurt.
5. Stands by you and supports you in any decision you decide to make or when you are sad, he lets you vent to him and what not.
6. Let's you take a crap ton of pictures of him. Most men aren't that fond of pictures, unless drunk, marriage, holding newborns.
7. If you like chick flicks and he watches them with you without wanting to shoot himself. High five.
8. Can stand you when you sound like a demon needing to be exorcized while on your period.
9. Sings in the car like a banshee with you.
10. Spontaneous, adventurous, brave, courageous, sexy, funny, nerdy, dorky, awesome. Non-douchebag like attitude, has a vocabulary that can exceed a 5th grader, and has his shit together. STAY WITH THE MAN. JESUS CHRIST. DON'T NEED A DAMN MANUAL TO UNDERSTAND THEM. THEY WANT FOOD, LOVE, SEX. AND BOOZE.
you skanks. wait until you are with the man and/or love the dude to have sexy time. that is a huge part of you that you are giving to someone. jeeze.
I feel like having dreams and loving myself right now. I am dead tired. My bed sounds like the most comfortable place on Earth. I have to see what is going on with Day 3 of severe weather. Day 2 of crazy tornadoes. Bring it on. I even took Gunner's car seat out of my car because I know my car is about to be raped by more hail. That thing was expensive.
Now, I am going to attempt some sleep before tornadoes hit and I have to go to work.
xoxo
Kylie
PS. I should have my pinup page running soon. <3
Monday, May 20, 2013
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
Please do the world a favor and do not breed.
Alright. I am heated! Pregnant people... WHY IN GOD'S NAME DO YOU GO TO THE BAR AND CLUBS, AND STRIP CLUBS ON YOUR OWN FREAKING FREE WILL?! YOU HAVE A CHILD WHO DOESN'T NEED ALL THAT SMOKE, THE BEERS YOU ARE DRINKING AND SHOTS, AND GOD KNOWS IF YOU ARE DOING DRUGS. For CHRIST SAKE. Your baby comes first. I hope your husband, baby daddy, boyfriend whatever. Thinks you are an idiot. I sure do. Give the baby to someone who actually would love to have a child and cannot. I would adopt your baby. So many people who cannot get pregnant would love to have your baby. You do NOT deserve to breed. AT ALL. Change your damn ways, worry about the baby, and get the fuck on with the little one's life. I see some people who are more worried about going out to the clubs and shit than worry about who is growing and relying on mommy on the inside.
Honey Boo Boo's mom and Snooki are better parents than you immature idiots. I could and would NEVER do that. The moment I found out I was pregnant. I threw my can of snus out, my cigarettes out, stopped drinking all caffeine and stopped drinking alcohol. If you wonder why your child comes out with RSV or heart, and other lung related issues. Please go back and remember you were the worst person ever during your pregnancy. Thanks. I cannot fathom how many stories I have heard when I went in to Baptist about girls who were doing cocaine and shit and their babies died 2 days before the due date. Seriously. you should go to hell for doing that to your child.
I love my child. Gunner will always come first. Top Gun is my world. I cannot imagine life without him. I do not like going out very much because I am all that he has! My ex husband is a douche and is not even in his life. And I have been a single mom pretty much since day 1. Put your big girl panties on and GET WITH THE PROGRAM. BE A MOTHER. BE A GOD DANG MOM TO YOUR CHILD. After your child is BORN, do NOT go out a week or a month after the child is born. THEY RELY ON YOU FOR EVERYTHING. EVERY LITTLE THING. YOU ARE TEACHING THEM EVERYTHING. I didn't go out until my 1st wedding anniversary and I was such a wreck, I was texting Kristie to make sure Gunner was okay. he was 4 months old. Went again when he was 6 months old to FIND A HOUSE IN SC. Responsible adult stuff. I am going out next weekend for a little time to myself. BECAUSE. I NEVER do. I work, take care of Gunner. Bust my butt, and had this planned two months ago.
So, horrible parents of epic fucking proportions to your babies and toddlers. Get a clue. Be a parent. Be better than Honey Boo Boo's mom and for christ sake get your shit together.
XOXOX
Kylie
Honey Boo Boo's mom and Snooki are better parents than you immature idiots. I could and would NEVER do that. The moment I found out I was pregnant. I threw my can of snus out, my cigarettes out, stopped drinking all caffeine and stopped drinking alcohol. If you wonder why your child comes out with RSV or heart, and other lung related issues. Please go back and remember you were the worst person ever during your pregnancy. Thanks. I cannot fathom how many stories I have heard when I went in to Baptist about girls who were doing cocaine and shit and their babies died 2 days before the due date. Seriously. you should go to hell for doing that to your child.
I love my child. Gunner will always come first. Top Gun is my world. I cannot imagine life without him. I do not like going out very much because I am all that he has! My ex husband is a douche and is not even in his life. And I have been a single mom pretty much since day 1. Put your big girl panties on and GET WITH THE PROGRAM. BE A MOTHER. BE A GOD DANG MOM TO YOUR CHILD. After your child is BORN, do NOT go out a week or a month after the child is born. THEY RELY ON YOU FOR EVERYTHING. EVERY LITTLE THING. YOU ARE TEACHING THEM EVERYTHING. I didn't go out until my 1st wedding anniversary and I was such a wreck, I was texting Kristie to make sure Gunner was okay. he was 4 months old. Went again when he was 6 months old to FIND A HOUSE IN SC. Responsible adult stuff. I am going out next weekend for a little time to myself. BECAUSE. I NEVER do. I work, take care of Gunner. Bust my butt, and had this planned two months ago.
So, horrible parents of epic fucking proportions to your babies and toddlers. Get a clue. Be a parent. Be better than Honey Boo Boo's mom and for christ sake get your shit together.
XOXOX
Kylie
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
Love is strong. It always wins
Since everyone is putting their two cents into the gay marriage.
They deserve equality. Love is love. Let them love madly, truly, and happily. Let them have tough times together as a married couple and come out even stronger. Let them plan the wedding of their dreams! They aren't killing anyone by doing so. They want what we have. Besides, homosexuals divorce rate in other States, are a crap ton lower than heterosexual couples. They deserve to have families whether or not they do get married. And raise kids. Being gay is not a choice. They are born that way. Every single male that I know who is gay. said they knew they like little Tommy instead of sally when hey were in grade school. Now, if you think it is a choice. Being an asshole is a choice. And assholes still get married. So, let them. :)
Now, while I'm laying in bed feeling like I have been stabbed in the lower abdomen with mother nature smiling. Gunner has his feet across my chest, and cannot get comfy either. He keeps tossing and turning. Oh, I write this on my phone, by the way. I just wonder why so many douche nuggets out there give a shit about gay marriage!? Not so long ago interracial couples was a crime, folks that were not white had to ride in the back, had their own drinking fountains, bathrooms... etc. Not anymore. Women couldn't vote nor drive. Now we can. Well some women still suck at driving. I for one do not. But, we should let them get married! Who gives a flying fuck about what they do in the bedroom. Hell, have you seen a porn? 90% of those women do shit that most normal women cannot. Nor men. I bet the same people who are wierded out by breast feeding are against marriage for gays. Just shut the hell up. One, what they do inside the bedroom is their business like what a straight couple does in their room is their business. It is 2013. Not year 1200. Get with the program. Did you know that Julius Cesar liked men? Did you know that Napoleon did too? Just to let you know, IT HAS BEEN HAPPENING FOR A FUCKING EVER. I support it. I could care less if you don't. Just let them be happy. They aren't hitting on you, so get over yourselves.
I love my homosexual friends. They make me laugh, smile, and my friend MCL knows a lot about my life. Oh, do ya sell the crepes? Lol.
Neil Patrick Harris is gay. Some people still do not know that. Would never have known, huh? The man who plays Sheldon Cooper is too. Didn't know that for a while myself. They aren't killing anyone. They are Badass. Enough said.
Now, everyone. Shut up. Let em get married, have babies, have sex, whatever. They can even endure the miserable but I still love your stubborn ass kind of marriage that straight couples go through after 25-50 years of marriage. Love is love. No matter how, with who, or any of the sorts. I support it. You should too.
xoxox
Kylie.
They deserve equality. Love is love. Let them love madly, truly, and happily. Let them have tough times together as a married couple and come out even stronger. Let them plan the wedding of their dreams! They aren't killing anyone by doing so. They want what we have. Besides, homosexuals divorce rate in other States, are a crap ton lower than heterosexual couples. They deserve to have families whether or not they do get married. And raise kids. Being gay is not a choice. They are born that way. Every single male that I know who is gay. said they knew they like little Tommy instead of sally when hey were in grade school. Now, if you think it is a choice. Being an asshole is a choice. And assholes still get married. So, let them. :)
Now, while I'm laying in bed feeling like I have been stabbed in the lower abdomen with mother nature smiling. Gunner has his feet across my chest, and cannot get comfy either. He keeps tossing and turning. Oh, I write this on my phone, by the way. I just wonder why so many douche nuggets out there give a shit about gay marriage!? Not so long ago interracial couples was a crime, folks that were not white had to ride in the back, had their own drinking fountains, bathrooms... etc. Not anymore. Women couldn't vote nor drive. Now we can. Well some women still suck at driving. I for one do not. But, we should let them get married! Who gives a flying fuck about what they do in the bedroom. Hell, have you seen a porn? 90% of those women do shit that most normal women cannot. Nor men. I bet the same people who are wierded out by breast feeding are against marriage for gays. Just shut the hell up. One, what they do inside the bedroom is their business like what a straight couple does in their room is their business. It is 2013. Not year 1200. Get with the program. Did you know that Julius Cesar liked men? Did you know that Napoleon did too? Just to let you know, IT HAS BEEN HAPPENING FOR A FUCKING EVER. I support it. I could care less if you don't. Just let them be happy. They aren't hitting on you, so get over yourselves.
I love my homosexual friends. They make me laugh, smile, and my friend MCL knows a lot about my life. Oh, do ya sell the crepes? Lol.
Neil Patrick Harris is gay. Some people still do not know that. Would never have known, huh? The man who plays Sheldon Cooper is too. Didn't know that for a while myself. They aren't killing anyone. They are Badass. Enough said.
Now, everyone. Shut up. Let em get married, have babies, have sex, whatever. They can even endure the miserable but I still love your stubborn ass kind of marriage that straight couples go through after 25-50 years of marriage. Love is love. No matter how, with who, or any of the sorts. I support it. You should too.
xoxox
Kylie.
Monday, March 18, 2013
Girls want attention Women want RESPECT
Alrighty then. Let's see here. I have been dealing with the military and Douchebag for way too long now. He is about to be served with a fistful of justice and a chewing of the bum by his chain of command. It is what happens when you are a deadbeat and don't man up to your responsibilities.
Now, ladies. When you are in your skibbies and posting them on the Internet or covering your boobies with your hand and posting it on the world wide web. As in, Instagram or Facebok, I have ultimately no respect for you. Girls, as I will call you, must not realize that billions of people can see what you post. You will not find your dream man or any respectable man for that matter. If you are spreading your legs to everyone and their dogs. No one will want you. I for one see this crap all the time and they wonder why they cannot get a MAN with his priorities in check. Let's see why... cover your breasts, bottom, and speak a language we can understand. Yolo or Swag does not pay bills, does not sound classy, and above all, childish. You want a man!? Do not look in bars, clubs, or MLK Blvd. Hahaha. Had to. Had to. You want a Drake or Justin Bieber like man. Might ad well find a pimp. They might treat you like Chris Brown. Or a pimp. Find a man who is ready to love, settle down, and had his life in order. No one wants my ex husband. I'll tell you that much. A 27 year old manchild. He has more debt, and affairs than I can count.
I for one want a man who will be laid back, converse with me, hang out, does not mind that I have a toddler, loves me for me, respects, supports, and cares for me. I, in return shall do the same. I love and care deeply when my heart is open. It is pretty hard to let my hopes up, knock my guard down or anything for that matter. Now, lets say you tell me, I am all you think about, cannot get me off of your head at work, and care for me. (When I am into you as well) and start being standoffish. I will stand back. Let you breathe, get your head in check, understand you have a lot on your plate, as well as mine, and be on my merry way. So simple! I am an open ear for everyone and a shoulder to lean on when you have a rough day. Regardless of friendship or whatever. Back to square one and be awesome. Even though I would like to know if I did or said something to make you stand offish. Shit, I am AMAZING. I put my child first, work, have my priorities in order, have a job, and bust my ass. I will check on you and make sure you are doing quite dandy for the day and be good. Easy, right? Yes.
I am a simple girl. I like you to remember certain dates. Pop in with a card or an acknowledgement that I exist on those dates and be fine. I love to cuddle and hold hands. And give kisses. Seriously, wine and star wars. I am 100% OKAY with that. Why!? I love it. Last weekend, I seriously sat at the house on St. Paddy's day and snuggled with my son! That was a lot more fun than getting drunk. Trust me. I don't babysit overgrown 20-30 something year old children. Handle your own. And know your limits. Don't do drugs and excessive alcohol. I swear we will be good. And I love to cook. Let me cook for you. Seriously. I could end world hunger with my cooking. Care about hygenie. Please. I like a man who takes care of himself. Doesn't mind to get some grease on him. Just smell good for Christ sake.
Now I know I am pretty awesome. I don't have many fucks to give. Do NOT need a manual with me. And am pretty straight forward. But, I have insecurities like all women. I look in the mirror and want a toned core that I work hard to get. And push for that goal. I want to look like a super sexy woman. I am pretty already. but, to be hot damn. That's what I want. I want to not feel like I can be out of your league. Which I seriously feel like to any man I think I'd date. Most women go, I don't know how I got you. You are amazing. It is because, you both are fucking fabulous together. And make others want to vomit with how cute you are. And that right there is what I want. Haha. Oh God, so much cute!! Just ready to settle down. If you throw a hissy fit, I will give you a beer, have you sit in the other room, breathe, and work this shit out. Divorce sucks. I never want to go through it again. Ever. Now. I am on team forever alone. Woo!
Not going to rush, just taking my time. Waiting for someone to sweep me off my feet, and have the best for Top Gun and I.
Women. Respect a man. And have a mature conversation and dress like a woman, have goals and ambitions, I swear you will have respect and a man. Act like a 15 year old at a HS party. Then, that's what you will get.
Xoxox
Kylie
Now, ladies. When you are in your skibbies and posting them on the Internet or covering your boobies with your hand and posting it on the world wide web. As in, Instagram or Facebok, I have ultimately no respect for you. Girls, as I will call you, must not realize that billions of people can see what you post. You will not find your dream man or any respectable man for that matter. If you are spreading your legs to everyone and their dogs. No one will want you. I for one see this crap all the time and they wonder why they cannot get a MAN with his priorities in check. Let's see why... cover your breasts, bottom, and speak a language we can understand. Yolo or Swag does not pay bills, does not sound classy, and above all, childish. You want a man!? Do not look in bars, clubs, or MLK Blvd. Hahaha. Had to. Had to. You want a Drake or Justin Bieber like man. Might ad well find a pimp. They might treat you like Chris Brown. Or a pimp. Find a man who is ready to love, settle down, and had his life in order. No one wants my ex husband. I'll tell you that much. A 27 year old manchild. He has more debt, and affairs than I can count.
I for one want a man who will be laid back, converse with me, hang out, does not mind that I have a toddler, loves me for me, respects, supports, and cares for me. I, in return shall do the same. I love and care deeply when my heart is open. It is pretty hard to let my hopes up, knock my guard down or anything for that matter. Now, lets say you tell me, I am all you think about, cannot get me off of your head at work, and care for me. (When I am into you as well) and start being standoffish. I will stand back. Let you breathe, get your head in check, understand you have a lot on your plate, as well as mine, and be on my merry way. So simple! I am an open ear for everyone and a shoulder to lean on when you have a rough day. Regardless of friendship or whatever. Back to square one and be awesome. Even though I would like to know if I did or said something to make you stand offish. Shit, I am AMAZING. I put my child first, work, have my priorities in order, have a job, and bust my ass. I will check on you and make sure you are doing quite dandy for the day and be good. Easy, right? Yes.
I am a simple girl. I like you to remember certain dates. Pop in with a card or an acknowledgement that I exist on those dates and be fine. I love to cuddle and hold hands. And give kisses. Seriously, wine and star wars. I am 100% OKAY with that. Why!? I love it. Last weekend, I seriously sat at the house on St. Paddy's day and snuggled with my son! That was a lot more fun than getting drunk. Trust me. I don't babysit overgrown 20-30 something year old children. Handle your own. And know your limits. Don't do drugs and excessive alcohol. I swear we will be good. And I love to cook. Let me cook for you. Seriously. I could end world hunger with my cooking. Care about hygenie. Please. I like a man who takes care of himself. Doesn't mind to get some grease on him. Just smell good for Christ sake.
Now I know I am pretty awesome. I don't have many fucks to give. Do NOT need a manual with me. And am pretty straight forward. But, I have insecurities like all women. I look in the mirror and want a toned core that I work hard to get. And push for that goal. I want to look like a super sexy woman. I am pretty already. but, to be hot damn. That's what I want. I want to not feel like I can be out of your league. Which I seriously feel like to any man I think I'd date. Most women go, I don't know how I got you. You are amazing. It is because, you both are fucking fabulous together. And make others want to vomit with how cute you are. And that right there is what I want. Haha. Oh God, so much cute!! Just ready to settle down. If you throw a hissy fit, I will give you a beer, have you sit in the other room, breathe, and work this shit out. Divorce sucks. I never want to go through it again. Ever. Now. I am on team forever alone. Woo!
Not going to rush, just taking my time. Waiting for someone to sweep me off my feet, and have the best for Top Gun and I.
Women. Respect a man. And have a mature conversation and dress like a woman, have goals and ambitions, I swear you will have respect and a man. Act like a 15 year old at a HS party. Then, that's what you will get.
Xoxox
Kylie
Monday, March 11, 2013
I'd ride an AT-AT wielding Thor's hammer into battle; while the Cantins Bar music is playing for you .
So, as I sit here in the nurses station currently listening to Carrie Underwood's, Blown Away... I think I would love to be rocking out with a kareoke machine with the fellow co-workers. That right there would be entertaining as hell. I would give myself a medal for bestscreech owl attempting to sing some Dixie Chicks or something.
Now, I did some facts the other day about myself. I should do goofy facts right now and some other random crap. Why? I'm awesome, and the funniest person EVER.
1. I LOVE to cook and bake. Fool, I would make you as fat as Jabba the Hut. I just have noone to bake for except my child. And my fat ass is addicted to cookies. Lay out some chocolate chip right now, so I can stare and wish I could eat one.
2. Applesauce. And Avacadoes. Not together. But I seriously could live off of those lovely consumptions. Nom nom nom.
3. I wish my ex would get sprayed by a skunk. He would smell as repulsive as he is.
4. I cannot get this one person off my head. I seriously have this butterfly feeling when I talk to him. Holy crap, Kylie. Get it together.
5. I wish I could race in NASCAR. yes. Nascar. When I was little I wanted to badly.
6. I love the outdoors. Camping. Hunting. Fishing. All of that. If you didn't know that, or don't like that, I am dragging you camping in a TENT. Screw that RV crap.
7. I love to dance. Whether it be in my underwear, at work, the car, or in a class. ANYWHERE. I love it. I probably scare people at stoplights I do dance. All sexy like. White girl style. Holler girlllll. Haha.
8. I laugh super easily. I mean it is not hard at all.
9. I have this weird obsession with pumpkins and fall in general. the word obsessed doesn't even cover it. Oh, I love lilies. Tigerlily especially.
10. Blake Shelton. So, his music since I was 11 has been legit. God Gave Me You is my song to Gunner. Gunner makes my days better. If he wasn't married to my woman crush, Miranda Lambert. I would rape him. Hahaha. Tie him up to my bed post and leave him there. ;)
11. Disney movies, Star Wars, Comics. Hello you nerds. I am a closet nerd. I seriously love everything about it all. I get more excited about Disneyland than most 5 year olds. Move outta my way children. The space mountain is calling my name. Tower of Terror!! I wanna ride that without freaking out.
12. I have a love hate relationship with scary movies. Or needles nor anything that will freak me out. I can watch the Hills Have Eyes. But I cannot watch the Ring. Hell, I couldn't even watch a guy put a needle through his arm on this show called, freakshow last week I literally cowered into a ball. I am a pansy with a a capital P.
13. When I am in a relationship or keen on someone. I love kissing. God. I am a kisser. Pecks on the cheek, mouth, forehead. Wake up and kiss you gently. I am a passionate person. I have a thing for guys that are bald or have facial hair. Or both! Haha! But, in all seriousness. I love cuddling, and kissing. Cuddles, kissing, holding hands. Best. Ever. :)
14. I sound like a boy hitting puberty when flowers bloom in spring. Damn those Bradford pear trees. I sound horrid for a month. Cannot breathe. Cannot sleep. Sound like an idiot. I might as well sound like the creep ass that breathes down your neck in movies. Because, that is me for a while in spring.
15. Last but not least, I seriously would not mind shoving my square toes boots up a couple women's asses. They need a damn reality check. Ha! Get the absolute hell over yourself. And grow up. I just sit there in silence wondering where they turned for the worst being like that, sucking at life, and who raised them to be idiots. Oh, some men are on that list too. Just complete moronic humans are out there. Epic facepalm.
Love me or hate me. Now, don't go parking like a fucktard who got clawed in the privates by a ferret trying to park while on your cellphone. I will leave notes on how bad you park. Stevie Wonder probably parks better than some people I have came out next to parked by my car. Ha!!
Xoxox
Kylie.
Now, I did some facts the other day about myself. I should do goofy facts right now and some other random crap. Why? I'm awesome, and the funniest person EVER.
1. I LOVE to cook and bake. Fool, I would make you as fat as Jabba the Hut. I just have noone to bake for except my child. And my fat ass is addicted to cookies. Lay out some chocolate chip right now, so I can stare and wish I could eat one.
2. Applesauce. And Avacadoes. Not together. But I seriously could live off of those lovely consumptions. Nom nom nom.
3. I wish my ex would get sprayed by a skunk. He would smell as repulsive as he is.
4. I cannot get this one person off my head. I seriously have this butterfly feeling when I talk to him. Holy crap, Kylie. Get it together.
5. I wish I could race in NASCAR. yes. Nascar. When I was little I wanted to badly.
6. I love the outdoors. Camping. Hunting. Fishing. All of that. If you didn't know that, or don't like that, I am dragging you camping in a TENT. Screw that RV crap.
7. I love to dance. Whether it be in my underwear, at work, the car, or in a class. ANYWHERE. I love it. I probably scare people at stoplights I do dance. All sexy like. White girl style. Holler girlllll. Haha.
8. I laugh super easily. I mean it is not hard at all.
9. I have this weird obsession with pumpkins and fall in general. the word obsessed doesn't even cover it. Oh, I love lilies. Tigerlily especially.
10. Blake Shelton. So, his music since I was 11 has been legit. God Gave Me You is my song to Gunner. Gunner makes my days better. If he wasn't married to my woman crush, Miranda Lambert. I would rape him. Hahaha. Tie him up to my bed post and leave him there. ;)
11. Disney movies, Star Wars, Comics. Hello you nerds. I am a closet nerd. I seriously love everything about it all. I get more excited about Disneyland than most 5 year olds. Move outta my way children. The space mountain is calling my name. Tower of Terror!! I wanna ride that without freaking out.
12. I have a love hate relationship with scary movies. Or needles nor anything that will freak me out. I can watch the Hills Have Eyes. But I cannot watch the Ring. Hell, I couldn't even watch a guy put a needle through his arm on this show called, freakshow last week I literally cowered into a ball. I am a pansy with a a capital P.
13. When I am in a relationship or keen on someone. I love kissing. God. I am a kisser. Pecks on the cheek, mouth, forehead. Wake up and kiss you gently. I am a passionate person. I have a thing for guys that are bald or have facial hair. Or both! Haha! But, in all seriousness. I love cuddling, and kissing. Cuddles, kissing, holding hands. Best. Ever. :)
14. I sound like a boy hitting puberty when flowers bloom in spring. Damn those Bradford pear trees. I sound horrid for a month. Cannot breathe. Cannot sleep. Sound like an idiot. I might as well sound like the creep ass that breathes down your neck in movies. Because, that is me for a while in spring.
15. Last but not least, I seriously would not mind shoving my square toes boots up a couple women's asses. They need a damn reality check. Ha! Get the absolute hell over yourself. And grow up. I just sit there in silence wondering where they turned for the worst being like that, sucking at life, and who raised them to be idiots. Oh, some men are on that list too. Just complete moronic humans are out there. Epic facepalm.
Love me or hate me. Now, don't go parking like a fucktard who got clawed in the privates by a ferret trying to park while on your cellphone. I will leave notes on how bad you park. Stevie Wonder probably parks better than some people I have came out next to parked by my car. Ha!!
Xoxox
Kylie.
Sunday, March 10, 2013
The Facts of Life, Kids!!
I am going to do something a little different... Facts about me.
1. I just started getting back into running. To look good for myself, to look as good as a Victoria Secret Angel, and hopefully look good enough for someone where they won't freaking cower and run away when I am in a bikini.... or better yet.... if I ever get into a relationship... Cheat on me... dammit.
2. I live in a family where sweets are their weakness. Now that I am healthy, Gunner and I get frozen yogurt once a week for my "cheat day". We LOVE ICE CREAM!! MY fat kid engages then. and cinnamon applesauce will do until goal acquired....
3. I love my son more than I will love anyone. More than anyone in my family, more than you, more than my future husband. More than Luke Bryan shaking his butt. I love my son to infinity and beyond!!
4. I have a love/hate relationship with my job. If I got a $5 pay raise I would love my job until someone pops my back again.
5. I love tornado season. YES. Bethani and I would pop in the car, go chase em. Now, I don't love it when I was so pregnant I had to push my mom out of the way so my 8 1/2 month pregnant self could run from getting hit in the head with hail into the cellar. That was humorous right there.
6. I care a lot. When I let you into my life, I start caring from day one. Friends, relationship wise. No matter what. If you are in a bind. I will help out with some money, fixing your tire, anything. I seem to not give any fucks lately. Divorce does that to you. But, deep down, I care about everyone. I worry a lot about some people if they are feeling harm, causing harm to oneself, depressed, angry. I try and find a way to help fix the situation. When I start to love someone. I love deeply. Just enough to give you your damn space though.
7. My biggest fear is I will die lonely. As in no husband no family around. I see things like this at the hospital and would want loved ones around me.
8. I seriously pray that Gunner's dad will man up and be there one day for him. I want a father figure in his life that will love him as much as me. Seeing Matthew not being there at all, not even child support wise, not even a phone call wise, KILLS ME. I don't get how people can abandon their child.
9. I seriously hate dieting. I want my results so, I stick to it. While I want to drown myself in wine when I step on the scale at my numbers... It is a lot better than 43 pounds ago!
But, If I didn't want to look like a Victoria's Secret Angel, gotta push towards it! Now, I already am a semi-sexy woman. Just could look better! Owning my curves while I have em.
10. I was in a horrible depression for a very long time. I got out of that rut in August-ish. I have anxiety and I could care less what you think about that. At least I don't have a bizarre foot fetish.
1. I just started getting back into running. To look good for myself, to look as good as a Victoria Secret Angel, and hopefully look good enough for someone where they won't freaking cower and run away when I am in a bikini.... or better yet.... if I ever get into a relationship... Cheat on me... dammit.
2. I live in a family where sweets are their weakness. Now that I am healthy, Gunner and I get frozen yogurt once a week for my "cheat day". We LOVE ICE CREAM!! MY fat kid engages then. and cinnamon applesauce will do until goal acquired....
3. I love my son more than I will love anyone. More than anyone in my family, more than you, more than my future husband. More than Luke Bryan shaking his butt. I love my son to infinity and beyond!!
4. I have a love/hate relationship with my job. If I got a $5 pay raise I would love my job until someone pops my back again.
5. I love tornado season. YES. Bethani and I would pop in the car, go chase em. Now, I don't love it when I was so pregnant I had to push my mom out of the way so my 8 1/2 month pregnant self could run from getting hit in the head with hail into the cellar. That was humorous right there.
6. I care a lot. When I let you into my life, I start caring from day one. Friends, relationship wise. No matter what. If you are in a bind. I will help out with some money, fixing your tire, anything. I seem to not give any fucks lately. Divorce does that to you. But, deep down, I care about everyone. I worry a lot about some people if they are feeling harm, causing harm to oneself, depressed, angry. I try and find a way to help fix the situation. When I start to love someone. I love deeply. Just enough to give you your damn space though.
7. My biggest fear is I will die lonely. As in no husband no family around. I see things like this at the hospital and would want loved ones around me.
8. I seriously pray that Gunner's dad will man up and be there one day for him. I want a father figure in his life that will love him as much as me. Seeing Matthew not being there at all, not even child support wise, not even a phone call wise, KILLS ME. I don't get how people can abandon their child.
9. I seriously hate dieting. I want my results so, I stick to it. While I want to drown myself in wine when I step on the scale at my numbers... It is a lot better than 43 pounds ago!
But, If I didn't want to look like a Victoria's Secret Angel, gotta push towards it! Now, I already am a semi-sexy woman. Just could look better! Owning my curves while I have em.
10. I was in a horrible depression for a very long time. I got out of that rut in August-ish. I have anxiety and I could care less what you think about that. At least I don't have a bizarre foot fetish.
Friday, February 22, 2013
I feel as no matter how hard I try, I will never be good enough
My title is true. I feel like I am way too nice to people and get screwed in return. Whether it be with friends. Or trying to get in a relationship. I don't blow up your phone. I don't act like a crazed fan at a Twilight premiere. I will be fine if I don't talk to you for days or weeks. But, after a bit... my feelings start getting confused. The biggest thing I hear why no one would date me is because I have a son. I never say, hey!! will you step up and be a dad. Since my ex is not in the picture. I don't like it when my guy friends or chick friends offer to help. I get super stubborn and knowing he is my child. I should do all the work. I am me. If you like it. Awesome. If you don't. Too damn bad. I won't change for anyone. I put my son first. He is my absolutely number one thing in my life. Friends come and go. I have become more brutally honest since my divorce. All because I don't give a care to give on what you think. You don't like the truth? Get over it. Would you rather be lied to forever!? No. Some of my friends make me want to take some tylenol pm and relax. Haha.
Men. It really isn't that complex to figure me out. Most women need a damn manual. When I don't have my son. I like to cook, bake, cuddle, watch movies, be awesome together. And preferablly you have to like the Chive like I. I am a tad obsessed with that site. I like wine, whiskey, and brews. I love star wars, Disney, Will Farrell movies, and kissing. I am a huge kisser. I love conversations, and pretty much relaxing on the couch with you. I don't care about clubs at all. I go to the bar once in a blue moon. All I ask is remember certain dates. Even if it is a dang card on my birthday I would be stoked. Not that hard, is it? Preferably hate Valentine's Day as much as me. Oh! Please like video games!! And please know how to at least change a tire on your vehicle. :) I don't need to show you up!! ;)
Women. Stop being psychotic bitches. Please. You worry about them going to the bar. Not calling you every single night. GET OVER YOURSELVES. they have lives. You have lives. Don't be a damn hypocrite when it comes to shit. Most of you women I would push into he ocean during a jellyfish warning to get it through your heads. If you don't like it that they Ste having a guys night drinking beer and playing some Borderlands 2. Join in. At least he ain't cheating on you.
Now, I ask myself how can someone like I be single? How can someone as awesome as me be alone? easy. I wont settle. don't do drugs. Don't be an idiot. I want to settle down. If I get in a relationship. It hopefully will be long term. why get in one if it is just a short term one? No point. I have my eye on someone. And hopefully he is attracted to me... but I will let it fall into place. It's all up to our fate. Noe. While I go get ready for sleep. Enjoy my blog.
KCCO.
Kylie.
Xoxox
Men. It really isn't that complex to figure me out. Most women need a damn manual. When I don't have my son. I like to cook, bake, cuddle, watch movies, be awesome together. And preferablly you have to like the Chive like I. I am a tad obsessed with that site. I like wine, whiskey, and brews. I love star wars, Disney, Will Farrell movies, and kissing. I am a huge kisser. I love conversations, and pretty much relaxing on the couch with you. I don't care about clubs at all. I go to the bar once in a blue moon. All I ask is remember certain dates. Even if it is a dang card on my birthday I would be stoked. Not that hard, is it? Preferably hate Valentine's Day as much as me. Oh! Please like video games!! And please know how to at least change a tire on your vehicle. :) I don't need to show you up!! ;)
Women. Stop being psychotic bitches. Please. You worry about them going to the bar. Not calling you every single night. GET OVER YOURSELVES. they have lives. You have lives. Don't be a damn hypocrite when it comes to shit. Most of you women I would push into he ocean during a jellyfish warning to get it through your heads. If you don't like it that they Ste having a guys night drinking beer and playing some Borderlands 2. Join in. At least he ain't cheating on you.
Now, I ask myself how can someone like I be single? How can someone as awesome as me be alone? easy. I wont settle. don't do drugs. Don't be an idiot. I want to settle down. If I get in a relationship. It hopefully will be long term. why get in one if it is just a short term one? No point. I have my eye on someone. And hopefully he is attracted to me... but I will let it fall into place. It's all up to our fate. Noe. While I go get ready for sleep. Enjoy my blog.
KCCO.
Kylie.
Xoxox
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